


brown

by taniavee28



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2009 Era (Phandom), Femslash, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-02-23 18:33:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18707629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taniavee28/pseuds/taniavee28
Summary: dani has a roach problem. she calls fi for emotional support at two a.m. lowercase intended.





	brown

**Author's Note:**

> (tw for insect mentions)
> 
> inspired by personal experience, conversations with my platonic English wife, a moment of inspiration from a very close bud, and the word wars chat. i love you. (not you, roach. not you.) 
> 
> also, the writing is intended to be in lowercase!
> 
> as always, this is a work of fiction. the characters danielle howell and fiona lester are the fictional female counterparts of dan howell and phil lester. in no way am i casting any aspersions on the real dan and phil.

“FIONA!”

 

fi flinches on the other end of the phone line. dani's shrill voice crackles through the beaten aiPhone clutched tightly in her hand. she sits bolt upright in her bluegreen bed that's a tad bit too empty, tucked in the upstairs room with the creaky floorboards and lingering shadows. 

 

“huh-wha? dani? are you alright?”

 

there's a spike of panic that shoots through fi like a laser beam. hearing dani call her in the middle of the night when she's supposed to be asleep _(yet_ _she's awake scrolling down months and months of texts like a lovesick fool_ ) is enough to jam her control system, sending her into Protective Mode. her hands are gripping onto the tiny phone so tight it hurts, but none of it seems to matter. not when danielle howell is on the other side of the line obviously distressed about something to this extent. 

 

dani seems to waste no time. “A COCKROACH JUST CLIMBED ON ME!” she hisses into the phone. her voice seems to be a little muffled and hushed this time, as if she was holding the phone away from her. her voice is in a whisper - a loud one nonetheless, and fi is able to make out the distant noises of shuffling and the faint clanking of something metallic against plastic. 

 

fi lets out a breath she doesn't know she held in. it comes out with a bark of amused- and mostly relieved - laughter. 

 

“fuck, dani. you got me worried there for a second.”

 

“WELL HOW DID YOU EXPECT ME TO BE REACTING TO A GODDAMN ROACH CRAWLING UP MY FUCKING LEG?” dani retorts, her voice raising and falling a few octaves, as if she's reminding herself to hush and not stir the whole house awake. 

 

fi's head, ever the wonderful simulator, automatically sets on imagining the sensation of something crawling up her leg. “ew,” fi whines. “it crawled up your  _ leg _ ?” 

 

she shudders. bugs really aren't her favourite. 

 

“it definitely fucking did.” dani grumbles. her voice is clearer now. fi might go as far as to the clarity of it makes her heart woosh as well, but she's learnt to put a lid on the things she says. sometimes a little too tight. they’re too corny for her own good.

 

besides, dani would never let her live it down if she caught wind of it.

 

dani’s shaking the aerosol can, the _ clink! _ and  _ clang! _ of the pea hitting the metallic walls of the can clearly audible. “right,” she says as she exhales and the sound of it over the phone is almost like a hiss. "i've got the spray. now i need to find the fucker."

 

"was it....big?" fi hesitates, wincing at the thought of a large brown roach running on her bare skin. 

 

"fully grown," dani grimaces.

 

there are two large brown roaches running in her head now. fi wedges the phone between her right cheek and shoulder as she taps two fingers against the tautskin of her fisted other hand. she forces herself to pay attention to the tapping sensation instead.

 

the silence is tense as dani's walking towards her room and fi's on the other side listening with anticipation. fi's not even there, yet she feels a slight trickle of anxiety for dani. fi could handle bugs a little better than dani does, and her place is blissfully low on roach invasion rates, so why isn't dani here with her in manchester? better yet, why isn't she there with her in reading? sure, she'd freak out a little seeing the critter but she'd probably be able to take things into her own hands, and, maybe get a little thank-you gift (the soft rosypink kind) from dani in return.

 

"fuck, where's it gone now?" frustration seeps into dani's tone. there's the sound of shuffling, followed by the brief whooshing noise of the mosquito repellent spraying out of the nozzle.  

 

dani yelps all of a sudden. "shit, shit, it's here, fuck!" the aerosol can rattles and the spraying becomes more intense. dani's stringing colourful sentences of spite and directing it towards the assaulting insect. 

 

"to hell with you, fiend!"

 

"die, die, die!"

 

"bloody motherf-AH FUCK!"

 

honestly, despite the earlier bout of unease, it all seems a little too funny for fi to control the giggles bubbling from within. 

 

"ha! take tha-are you  _ laughing _ at me, fiona?" 

 

fi can't stop giggling. 

 

"this fucker was crawling on my legs just as i was about to properly nurse my lady boner, killing off the entire mood - so i killed it instead - and you're laughing at my victory?' dani whisper-screeches indignantly. fi's attuned enough to recognize the mirth in her tone (it's something dani would never admit), and the giggles escalate to full-blown pillowmuffled laughter. it doesn't take much longer for dani to start laughing along.

 

when they've both calmed down somewhat fi remembers a little detail she'd picked up from dani's dramatic little speech. "so, how did that lady boner nursing go, hmm?" fi waggles her eyebrows and then remembers that she doesn't have a screen (well, she does, but she can't quite see grainy danielle on the other side with her hard lines softened by fuzzy slow internet) and that dani can't exactly see her, but then dani says "ugh. shut up. i can hear you waggling your fucking eyebrows right now, you perv."

 

maybe dani can see her after all. maybe she's secretly a psychic and can see the nights when she reaches out to the wetpinkred rawness within and soars heights with dani's name on her lips. 

 

"-fi, fi?"

 

"huh? oh-yeah, sorry, yeah, i'm here, i was just thinking about something," she splutters. it's not a lie. but it's not the entire truth either. 

 

"about what, hmm?" dani teases. 

 

"you." fi says in an exaggerated sultry voice and laughs it off, hoping it doesn't come off as too put-on. dani shrieks in mock horror and joins in, because of course she does. they share pillowmuffled laughter for the second time within five minutes, and when it wears off a comfortable silence settles between them for a bit.  

 

dani's the one to break it now. "hey fi?"

 

"hmm?"

 

"you reckon we'd get a place together someday?"

 

the thought shouldn't feel so much like a promise, but it does. it feels like a window of hope. a kind of assurance that this pretty person would still be a big part of her life a few years into the future, that she'd still stay, that she'd get to do and say the things she wants to with her. it feels like a roundabout way of saying "let's build a life together, a life void of whatever it is that's keeping us apart." fi wants nothing more than to subscribe to it. aches and burns from the past tend to resurface, as they always do, but she knows deep down with an ancient kind of knowing that dani's here to stay. 

 

so she says with a fierce sort of assurance that comes from a place transcending time, "yeah. we will. and we'll be a little more compassionate to these critters the next time."

**Author's Note:**

> leave kudos and comments if you liked!


End file.
